As Christmas (yes I said Christmas and not the stupid 'h' word) is upon us I have been doing a lot of thinking. Most of my thoughts are triggered by conversations I have with others or things I've noticed. We recently had a conversation in our parent preschool class about Christmas and we got onto the topic of people in need at Christmas. The question was asked
Why are people so needy at this time of the year when they know it comes at the same time every year - can't they plan better?
My first thought was YES, yes they can and should. I certainly do. It took me back to a quote I used to have in my office when I was an administrator for a University Learning Resource Centre full of 500+ students.
"Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine"
Wooooooow there cowgirl (k, so I'm not a cowgirl but I've ridden a horse before so it counts). Seriously? Here I sit in judgement of these people when I have been blessed beyond measure, including the blessing of being somewhat organized and a planner? Do I fully know their situation and even if I do (or in most cases "think I do"), is it still my place to call judgement????
ABSOLUTELY BIG FAT NO!!!
Not only did I remind myself of that very important lesson but it started that thinking wheel in my head again. I can't imagine the pressure that some families must feel at this time of year, and we're all partially to blame for this. Think for a minute. How many of us race out there to get our kids the latest and greatest (regardless of the cost), how many of us conform to 'social norms' and buy our kids things because that the 'cool' thing to have this year. "Everyone has one" so my kid's going to have one too. Shame on us. Shame on us for creating such a society. I'm not saying that we shouldn't buy gifts or want to give nice gifts but shame on us in thinking that that's what it's all about.
- Do my kids have nice things? Yes.
- Do I race out and buy them the latest and greatest just because their friends have one? No.
- Is it a money issue? No.
- Do they survive? Absolutely.
- Are they better for it? I believe they are.
- Are they happy? Yes.
The pressure that families must feel to not only get a gift for their child but get the 'right kind' of gift. It's a real shame. I have seen my kids eyes light up when they unwrap a little tub of playdough or a pack of crayons from the dollar store just as much as they have when they unwrap that Barbie Dreamhouse! Then of course next year I gotta do even better! When does it end? We're creating a society of spoilt, indulgent children that will grow into teenagers and adults with huge sense of entitlement issues.
I'm not perfect in this, so don't get me wrong. I just think we could all take a step back and think for a minute about how we approach Christmas.
Back to my initial thought (the one about giving to the less fortunate) - we will continue to give, just as we have always done in the past. It's not my place to judge. If there's a need I will help as much as I can. If that means that we go without, that's ok, I'd rather my girls learn sacrifice over indulgence.
